I Amsterdam

Solo Trip to Amsterdam [shadows of self]

I walked through the canals

and journeyed between the row houses-

seeing myself at every turn.

As I walked around my city,

one long jaunt back through time,

I trekked

through past visits

and met

me.

I was the man with the baby
on the bicycle,
my wide-eyed grinning daughters-
with their handlebar clinging, manic laughter
ringing through my ears.

I snuck up on me at Vondelpark,

the couple in their 20's, before kids,

holding hands and strolling.

I saw my somber face emerging from the Anne Frank house,

forever changed by the empathy walk through 

the attic.

I was the drunken dancers at the concert-

my moves fluid and steady in my mind-

yet disjointed and flailing on the

dance floor. 

Wandering the ever widening spoke,

I saw me as

I priced the pharmacy-

Dads buying bandaids and

a young man with a pregnancy test in hand.

Pieces of my former lives

shined on corners like

shimmering hope reflecting

 back at me.

I studied the father explaining the art

at the Van Gogh museum,

hearing my own explanation

of brush strokes

and a tortured soul

poured onto the canvas.

On the way out of town,

training to Schiphol-

the family playing cards was

my unending Uno marathons with Rosie and Bella-

cleverly holding a last wild card,

plotting my win just before arrival.

I walked the canals

of my life-

drifting through time,

collecting the pictures

and memories.

I amsterdam